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How to Make Divorce Less Stressful and More Affordable

January 10th, 2020 by mjp-admin

Is there a way to make divorce less stressful and more affordable?

Yes. And it all sums up to “mediation”.

How It’s Less Stressful

Mediation is less stressful because spouses are in charge of decision making. It allows a couple to handle their affairs rather than letting the legal system take control.

Having more control over decision making in divorce means there are no surprises and couples can move as slow or fast as they want through the process– they move according to their own timeline.

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Maybe It’s Not a Marital Problem, Maybe It’s a Holiday Problem

January 10th, 2020 by mjp-admin

I’ve discussed Holiday Marital False Alarm Syndrome which predictably arises each year in December throughout many households. That’s why it does not come as a surprise each January when my calendar is quickly filled with divorce consultations. However, some couples are surprised by the outcome of their appointment with me.

By making a divorce mediation appointment and by honestly answering probing questions I pose to them,

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Beware of Magical Thinking in Divorce

November 12th, 2019 by mjp-admin

Many people who come to see me seem to think one or all of the following myths about divorce:

  1. Divorce is going to be the answer to all my problems.
  2. Divorce will cost me money and be an unpleasant process, but after it’s final, I will be just fine and so will the kids.

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The Imperative of Self-Care for Divorcing Parents: Arranging Social Options During Holidays

October 16th, 2019 by mjp-admin

A client of mine from some years ago, Mrs. X, chose a proactive stance in tackling her first Thanksgiving holiday alone after her divorce. Determined to not simmer in a sulk and drown herself in solitude with a bottle of dry Chardonnay, she chose to serve the impoverished instead.  Ironically, by nourishing the needy in the St. Louis community with a holiday meal,

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Four Steps to Getting A Divorce

August 15th, 2019 by Marta J. Papa

Once you have decided with certainty that a divorce is in your best interest, I recommend following these four steps:

1. Back Off From Social Media

This first step is essential. If you are unhappy in your marriage, it is not unusual for others to know about it, especially if you are inclined to share personal information on Facebook and other social media sites.

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How to Choose a Mediator

July 23rd, 2019 by Marta J. Papa

I have six recommendations for couples who are looking for a mediator.

  1. Ask about their training and if they are court-approved mediators.
  2. Ask about the number of meditations they’ve successfully completed.
  3. Interview more than one mediator and see who you feel is knowledgeable, keeps the playing field level and you feel comfortable talking to and is not judgmental.

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