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Beware of Magical Thinking in Divorce

November 12th, 2019 by mjp-admin

Many people who come to see me seem to think one or all of the following myths about divorce:

  1. Divorce is going to be the answer to all my problems.
  2. Divorce will cost me money and be an unpleasant process, but after it’s final, I will be just fine and so will the kids.

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The Imperative of Self-Care for Divorcing Parents: Arranging Social Options During Holidays

October 16th, 2019 by mjp-admin

A client of mine from some years ago, Mrs. X, chose a proactive stance in tackling her first Thanksgiving holiday alone after her divorce. Determined to not simmer in a sulk and drown herself in solitude with a bottle of dry Chardonnay, she chose to serve the impoverished instead.  Ironically, by nourishing the needy in the St. Louis community with a holiday meal,

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The Importance of Self-Care for Those in the Midst of Divorce Proceedings

September 26th, 2019 by mjp-admin

Family holidays and get-togethers are often a catalyst for divorcing parents to bring unnecessary personal distress upon themselves, each other, and, ultimately, their children.  Fortunately, the counter-defense to such a consequence is rather simple: the priority of healthy choices in self-care.

A Story From My Files About the Need for Self-Care

Some years ago, I was representing a woman (let’s call her Mrs.

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What to Anticipate After Delivering the News of Divorce to Your Children

September 5th, 2019 by mjp-admin

Your resolution to co-parent with maturity and your mutual insistence upon the welfare of your children at this time are commendable. To that end, you have an agreed-upon script and an appropriate setting in place. Now, it is time to prepare for the audience’s response to this family drama: your children’s reactions.

Reactions Are Unique to Each Child

Much will depend upon the age,

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When, Where, and How to Deliver Your Divorce Script to Your Children

August 20th, 2019 by Marta J. Papa

In my article Scripting the News of Your Divorce for your Children, I provide an idea of how to prepare the news of divorce to your kids. Having a script that stays on-message and is well-practiced is important because this content matters. What’s also important is the context in which that content is delivered. When? Where? How?

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Four Steps to Getting A Divorce

August 15th, 2019 by Marta J. Papa

Once you have decided with certainty that a divorce is in your best interest, I recommend following these four steps:

1. Back Off From Social Media

This first step is essential. If you are unhappy in your marriage, it is not unusual for others to know about it, especially if you are inclined to share personal information on Facebook and other social media sites.

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